Saturday, 28 May 2011

light at the end of the tunnel

As many of my family would attest to, I used to be rather an emotional child. Crying was my forte! Many of the family photo's have 7 smiling children...

and one in floods of tears... yes you guessed it - that's me!

By the time I reached my teens, I had calmed down with the old flood gates, but still bawled like a baby if something was sad in a film or I was overly happy. You see, I think crying is a great way to make yourself feel better about life. Many see crying as a sign of weakness, but I think that's nonsense. Scientifically crying allows you to get rid of lots of poisonous toxins. For me, I just feel a lot better after a good cry!

Yesterday, I was having one of those really emotional days. For the past few weeks I've been developing an abcsess, and in the last few days my cheek has become really swollen, resulting in me looking like the monster from The Goonies . Anyway, I had started to panic - apparently having an abcsess when your pregnant is very dangerous for the baby. After the first emergency appointment, the pain and swelling got worse. Yesterday the pain was at it's height. I'd managed to keep a calm demeanor all morning, but at lunch time Aniah was having a crying fit because I'd taken yet another piece of digital equipment off her (why do they always go for the stuff they can't have?). She looked a little like this...

As I picked her up to console her, she threw herself forward knocking her head into my very swollen gums and teeth. That was it. The pain surged through my mouth. I put my crying baby back down, and begain wailing myself. We must have made such a picture... anyone looking through the window at that point might have been tempted to call social services - after all there was a crazy crying lady clutching her face with a baby crying on the floor. This was the kind of crying where I was transported back to my childhood ... the kind of emotion where you just want to throw yourself on the ground and stamp your feet. Well, I didn't throw myself on the ground, but I did stamp my feet a few times. After a minute of this, Aniah actually stopped crying and was looking at me in confusion, probably thinking 'Mummy has gone mental'.

After a little while, the pain eased and I could think normally again. If not for anything else - the crying and stamping helped distract from the pain a little.

So later that day, I went for a walk with Aniah to feed the ducks, trying to hide my goonies face anytime I saw anyone coming in my direction. As I watched her squeal and clap at the ducks, I remembered that there was a happier life before this abcsess. I then got a phonecall from a friend who also happened to be a dentist. He told me that he had time at the end of the day to look at my tooth and see if he could do anything before my next dental appointment (which isn't for another 2 weeks) ... the tears started welling again. I accepted gratefully. The appointment went well, and though it didn't eliminate the pain imediately, I felt happier knowing that there was less chance of it harming the baby.

This morning the pain has almost completely gone and I nearly look human again... YAY!!!

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