Thursday, 10 April 2014

the beginning of all things

Thought for the week Thursday

'A baby is like the beginning of all things,
wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities'
Eda. J Le Shan

So far this pregnancy I have been completely distracted with work and the general business of life that I haven't really stopped to think about the change that is soon to come when we welcome baby 3. The majority of the time the due date has seemed so far in the distance that it felt like it would never really come. Reality check. Due date is tomorrow. What? When did 9 months just go by?

Some of you might find this next part offensive, but I don't care. It's a reality of pregnancy and birthing children. Today as I got out of my car after having nipped into town to grab a few last bits and bobs for the baby I realised I needed the loo. So what?... I hear some of you say. The toilet is in the house. No biggy. 

Well, I reached the front door, managed to unlock it, close the door then begun fumbling with the keys to try and lock it behind me as I started the 'bob' motions (you mothers out there know what I'm talking about). As the urges to go to the loo got stronger I abandoned my keys on the floor and decided making the lavatory in time was far more important. Disaster averted. I questioned at this point, and have done so before, when using trampolines for example, why do I do this to my body? Pregnancy and child birth = no bladder control, stretch marks, not so pert body parts and other more graphic details. Yes, I can hear you big sister Bethany (midwife) shouting... 'why aren't you doing your pelvic floor exercises'? Too lazy and forgetful ... this one is on my own head. 

Why share this delightful information? There is a reason.

As a woman who is about to go through the traumas of labour for the third time, there are certain 'sacrifices' I have made and will soon make in order to sustain the right of holding that precious new bundle of absolute delight and joy in my arms. 

As I looked at the shelves of baby products today, I was suddenly struck with a huge wave of emotion. I'll be perfectly honest and say this is the first time I have truly felt excited about baby 3. Perhaps it is because I have been so busy, or that other events in our family's circumstances have been weighing more heavily on my mind. Maybe it is because I have had misgivings about my ability as a mother of 2 and I am concerned that I am going to be doing a disservice to the new baby and the two I already have? 

It could be all of these reasons. But today that changed in a big way.

I suddenly realised my husband and I were about to meet a new little person. A little person with a personality all of its own. God willing, this baby will grow up and change our life forever in ways we don't even know yet. Through their actions and life choices they will give us the opportunity to feel a multitude of differing emotions and experiences...love, laughter, tears, pride, disappointment, worry, peace, joy. 

This person inside me has the potential to change the lives of others in ways I can't even know yet. What will they become? What will they look like? Who will they meet? What will they go and do in their life time? How will I change as a person as a result of who they are? 

Life is so beautiful. It is precious. I really am so very excited to meet my little one. Don't take too much longer baby. I love you already. 



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